Game Over: Him or Me?

So  Sara and I met up this morning after I said the cliche, “we need to talk” bit over the phone.

She seemed to know this was not going to go well, so I just came out and asked “Are you seeing Terrence?”

Now before I get into her answer, I have to explain who  this Terrance guy is exactly.  Sara and I are in some drama classes…In fact, that’s how we met…From the moment I met her I could tell she was one of those flirtatious types.  She walked around and knew how to string men along. She literally looked like a puppet master backstage as she tugged on every guys heart strings.  One second she was playfully close to one man, the next second she had a new guy eating out of the palm of her hands.  And so, at first glance, I decided to keep my distance.  Or so I thought.  She made her way to me and before I knew it, I had fallen for her.  It was playful at first but as we got closer, the relationship became more serious.  I excused a lot of her “flirtatious” behavior because I thought that she would never go beyond playful flirting.  (Of course looking back now, I know how stupid that was of me.)

It just so happens that one of those people she “playfully flirts” with is Terrence– 34-year-old, freshly divorced, semi-professional actor  in the drama department.  When I saw them together, I just figured it was another one of those cases of the older wishful-thinking guy flirting with the younger girl who was out of his league, She’s only 22, and very sexy, so I couldn’t really blame the man.  It may have started innocent, but this relationship clearly blew up into something more than wishful thinking and playful flirting.

So back to this morning. I cut to the chase, “Sara are you seeing Terrance behind my back?”

“Look we are just friends,” Sara told me. “It’s not like we had sex.  I was going to tell you about us, but I figured you would trip out.”

“Umm, if he is just a friend then why is he saying he loves you?”

“See your tripping out.  We haven’t had sex or nothing.  We are just friends and I like being with him.  Look I just don’t want to be tied down now, I don’t really wanna be in some committed relationship.  I need to keep my options open.” she said.

“OK…Then what were we?”

“Honestly? Don’t get mad. You’re really good in bed, and that’s it right now (BTW, that really is what she said. No, I’m not tooting my own horn, and yes ,I am a little proud of it so let me gloat for a sec I deserve it!) OK Continuing…”I mean honestly, how serious did you think we were going to get?  You’re just a college actor, you’re moving to a place I wouldn’t be caught dead in, and your big dream is to be a rapper!? Come on!  Let’s just call this what it is–a good time–and keep it at that!”

I swear, I  had systematically walked through every single response she could have given me…Like, we’ve been seeing each other for awhile, or sometimes we hang out…But I was NOT prepared for the words that came out of her mouth just then. I mean–What do you say to that? I was stunned, not because it came out of the blue, but because I finally heard those words.  I know my dreams are crazy, I know my chances of success are less then 1 in a million, but I figured as an aspiring actress herself, she understood me.  Instead, she saw me exactly as I feared everyone else does, a joke.

So I did the only thing I could do in that instant. I decided to keep some dignity. Hot or not, I sure as hell wasn’t gonna be somone’s bootie call. So I told her this, “Make a choice, him or me. You can believe in me and work on us, or you can find somebody else.  Think about it for a few days and let me know your decision.”      And with that I went home, had a little pity party for myself, quickly shook it off and began writing for about 2 hours straight.  The freestyles and rhymes came non-stop, although granted, mainly about women, but they came nonetheless.



  1. Way to go Prophet! I know it wasn’t the answer you wanted, but you stuck up for yourself and this girl is gonna be KICKING herself in the ass for letting a great guy walk away, if not now in a couple of years for sure!

    You’ll find the right one, the one who won’t care what the living arrangements are and the one who will stand by you as you fight your way to the top. She’ll believe in you and give you the respect you need, this Sara chick obviously wasn’t up for the job – her loss, not yours at all!

    Power to ya for standing up for yourself!

  2. […] going head first into this rap music to help me get over my ex and make my life better.  I have something to prove to her and myself.  Hell yeah, I can’t […]

  3. […] as well as we had on Facebook…For one thing, we really make each other laugh.  And unlike Sara, she is actually supportive of my hip hop dreams.  Lucy’s been behind me 100% in my acting […]

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